In his biography, Albert Einstein describes how some of his greatest discoveries first came from his body in the form of a tingling and other enlivening physical sensations that then informed the images and insights that led him to his greatest discoveries. This has profound and practical implications for coaching—small nuances in a client’s speech or body language contain keys to transformation. Recognizing and responding to them intuitively can uncover life-changing insights. Silence and attention to physical sensations and emotions is the doorway to discovery. At the start of a recent session, I heard two distinct voices in my client. One was a pioneer of consciousness and creativity. |
Pathways to Alignment
People say that what we are all seeking is a meaning for life…I think that what we are really seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on a purely physical plane will have resonance within our innermost being and reality, so that we can actually feel the rapture of being alive. —Joseph Campbell
As coaches, we take clients deeper than “figuring out” what they want to do. We take them into the experience of their core aliveness. Grounded in what resonates at the soul level, their life choices become more purposeful, rich and satisfying.
We off er five pathways to alignment, which remind people to connect with their core essence.… Read more
Identifying Parts
Once you realize that a part is calling for attention or blocking your progress, you need to find the right one so that you can talk to it. It is crowded in your psyche; just calling for any part is like shouting “Hey, you!” at a party. You’ll probably get a response, but not necessarily from the one you want. So, how do you identify and call the part you’re looking for?
NAME
The simplest way to invite a part into a dialogue is to ask for it by name:
“I want to talk to my Protector (or Critic, Perfectionist, Pleaser, Skeptic, etc.)”… Read more
Leadership Development and Capacity Building
Historically, most funders and senior teams in the social sector put their focus on program results, and wouldn’t dream of using part of their budget for leadership development. The social sector faces serious problems about cultivating the next generation of leadership. In the Daring to Lead study of more than 3,000 executive directors, 75% plan to leave their organization within the next five years and less than 17% have succession plans. Facing the question of whether to “make” or “buy” leaders, isn’t even an option. They won’t be able to recruit from other agencies simply because there aren’t enough leaders waiting in the wings.… Read more
How Confidence Can Help You Become A Better Leader
Whether it’s your first day at your new job or you have just been promoted to a new position, I bet you’re feeling pretty anxious. This is normal for everyone who is given a new challenge. But it is important to face your fears and boost your confidence in order to be successful in your new position.
Why Confidence is Your Biggest Asset
According to a study at the University of Melbourne, there is a strong correlation between confidence and occupational success. Self confidence is a useful thing to have, especially when starting a new job. Confidence will help you on your way to success, in addition to many other benefits.… Read more
Out of the Box, Into the World: Expanding the Impact of Coaching
“We shape our self to fit this world
and by the world are shaped again.
The visible and the invisible
working together in common cause,
to produce the miraculous.”
—David Whyte, “Working Together”
Coaches witness and participate in creating the miraculous. We see it every day with our clients. Yet, coaching hasn’t even begun to touch the impact that is possible if we become a more integrated partner with the world. We still stand separate and build our businesses. We guard our turf and look to define ourselves in relation to other professions.
The successful coaching businesses of the future will be the ones that step out of their corner and take full advantage of networks and collaborations.… Read more
Interactive Co-Facilitation: Training Programs that Rock!
Most people who call themselves co-facilitators actually practice a tag-team approach where one facilitator works with the group at a time. Using a more collaborative, interactive approach where both facilitators work together simultaneously, almost like improv theatre, we demonstrate deep trust in each other and in the flow. With some practice, we learn to:
- Blend facilitation by building on each other’s ideas
- Make changes in direction without refuting each other
- Model trust without checking excessively with each other
- Interrupt each other with grace
- Jointly hold the needs of the group and the needs of individuals as a gift
- Track time while giving each other space
- Stay aware of natural openings
- Share feedback openly and support each other’s growth
- Empathize and celebrate success
I especially enjoy co-facilitating with Mary Kuentz for her playfulness and directness and because we both value alignment.… Read more
Going into Resistance
As emotional issues come up, our clients may experience resistance. As coaches, rather than resisting the client’s resistance, we flow with what is happening in a given moment. That doesn’t mean we just let the client wander around aimlessly or that we passively accept oppression or harm. It means when blocks or obstacles arise, we embrace them with curiosity. As a spiritual attitude, we choose to face challenges and explore resistance without trying to change it. Facing whatever troubles arise frees up all the physical and emotional energy that would otherwise be spent in resistance.
If we hear, “I don’t want to talk about that,” or “This is a waste of time,” we use our intuition as we explore.… Read more
Intuition
Intuition is a broad cognitive term that refers to information, ideas, knowledge and understanding that come to us outside the rational and logical channels of thinking. It may come to us as an image, spontaneous thought, feeling or a strong sense. Intuition is a response to all that is present, right now. When we share our intuition in the moment, new possibilities can emerge. If we rely solely on our thinking, we miss out on vast sources of knowledge.
When we over-analyze or second-guess the messages that come through our body-emotional intelligence, we miss out. Worst case scenario, our hunch is not fruitful and we learn from that.… Read more
How do Co-facilitators Support Each Other?
Co-facilitators can support each other by co-designing learning objectives, creating pre-session time for mutual connection, and sharing what each facilitator wants to get from the experience personally. We can set agreements about the support we want to address our personal challenges. Some requests I’ve heard co-facilitators ask:
- To help me track time, will you set a timer for 15 minutes and say, “You have about 2 more minutes”?
- Will you remind me during the debrief to celebrate disappointment and capture the learning?
- To increase alive engagement, can you support me in asking dissatisfied participants for their feedback live in the moment?