In this case, she wants to be herself and let go of the expectations that she has to be an expert in all matters. Addressing this, she sees that her expectations of herself are in her way and when she becomes more comfortable with being in her own skin, then the meeting no longer looks ominous. This new light changes how she feels about the meeting and what she needs to do to prepare. By changing her viewpoint, she is more in touch with herself and can respond more fluidly with whatever happens in the meeting.
Coach: So Anya, what would you like to be coached on today?
Anya: Vision. I need some clarity around my vision. To really know what my vision is (presenting agenda: clarity on vision).
Coach: Let’s see… If you have clarity on your vision, what would it bring to you? (Looking for deeper agenda)
Anya: More confidence and concrete action. Knowing where to get business and work for myself (deeper agenda: getting business).
Coach: Let’s unpack your vision a little bit more. What clarity do you already have about your vision?
Anya: I want to work in the area of women empowerment. Especially those who take a career break and want to go back to work. And…
Coach: (At this moment, I asked myself, “what is her soul yearning for?” As she spoke about women’s empowerment, I started noticing her tentativeness around the word. She spoke the word “empowerment” three times. The stories of women empowerment she told had similarity to her own story. I got an intuitive flash around the word empowerment.)
As you talk about women’s empowerment, I have a question: What would unleash your power?
Anya: (pauses and sighs)… Someone else getting that power out of me. It’s a struggle for me to unleash my own power. Today I was thinking, if I want to work on women empowerment, how am I empowering myself? When I do it myself, it’s a slow process (transformational agenda—unleashing my power).
Coach: And where does ‘power’ reside in your body? (I pursue further to explore the transformational agenda and follow the natural opening around ‘power’.)
She pointed to her lower stomach/womb and described that her power lies there like a chakra (wheel of energy). We used the Embracing the Shadow pathway to engage in a fierce conversation with her chakra. Chakra said that it has not been valued for the last five years and wants to come back in its power. On return to the seat of awareness, Chakra came back to her throat instead of her belly, seeking to express its true power.
Later, while reflecting on the experience, Anya shared that she is feeling as if an old friend is returning. She also shared that five years back (when Chakra went dormant), her mother had died. She was longing to reconnect with this inner power (transformational agenda) which is now manifesting in her business and practice (presenting and deeper agenda).
Written by Manish Srivastava
Excerpt from Coaching for Transformation by Lasley, Kellogg, Michaels and Brown.
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